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May 9, 2011: Kepler: Simon Cowell just hired Paula Abdul to be on his new show, X-Factor! Al: I'm sure I don't care. Leave me alone. I can't program my DVR for September? Kepler: Ha!
May 11, 2011: Al: Before the internet, only my closest friends knew my obscure political views. But now thanks to Facebook, I can tell all of my friends about the crank I think should be president. Will: Won't a lot of people unfriend you if you do that? Al: That's a secondary benefit.
May 13, 2011: Mitch: You were in a 4-g inverted dive with a MIG-28? Al: I felt the need, the need for speed! Will: What now? Mitch: You know Talk Like A Pirate Day? May 13th is Top Gun day. You talk like Top Gun! Will: The defense department regrets to inform you that your sons are dead because they were stupid. Al: Not stupid... dangerous! Chomp!
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