Will in a tube
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Monday, July 30, 2001
Get your hands off me, you damn Dirk Diggler...

Wednesday, August 1, 2001
Happy birthday, Dad!

Friday, August 3, 2001
We couldn't afford a script, either...

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July 30, 2001: Will: We think the planet's been overrun by apes. We need someone to go check it out. But whoever it is has to act wooden. Al: I'll do it! "Al Gore wooden or "Keanu" wooden? Will: "Marky Mark" wooden. Al: Wow! Hardcore! August 1, 2001: Al: Hey! How's it goin'? Ape: Aaa! Human!! Quick! Sieze and torture the inferior human! Al: Whoa! Whoa!! Inferior? Torture?! We talk just like you, and clearly we're as intelligent. Why can't we just have a peaceful, rational discussion? Ape: Because we need a big fight scene at the end to sell tickets. Al: Right! War it is, then! August 3, 2001: Ape: Observe, human, the destiny of your "superior" human race. Al: Oh my God! You maniacs! You finally did it!! You blew it up! Damn you!! Damn you all to hell! (Looking up, it's not the Statue of Liberty, but a Bob's Big Boy statue) Is this the best we could do? Ape: We had a limited budget.