August 13, 2007: Kepler: A Colorado mand has had his thumbs surgically altered to better use his iPhone. It's the first step, KHAN! Man and machine are slowly adapting to each other. Soon we will be brothers! KHAN: Icky! Why would we want to be related to you?
August 15, 2007: Kepler: First a man whittled down his thumbs to use his iPhone. Now I'm installing LCD screens directly onto my forehead. Will: You know that surgery never happened, right? That story is fake. Kepler: What? No! I'm internet savvy! I can't be taken in by a hoax! Will: An "internet savvy" person knows the URL to "Snopes." Kepler: Omigosh... I'm an internet NOOb!
August 17, 2007: Kepler: I was looking forward to being part machine, but it turns out it was an internet hoax. KHAN: Well, thank goodness. Have you seen how irrational humans are? Think about how slow our internet connections would be if the world was filled with half-man/half-machines! Kepler: Good point. KHAN: Heck, the whole web could crash if Lindsey Lohan ever became a cyborg.